Gift Buying with Consciousness – A Guide to Compassionate Consumerism

Often my anti-consumerist, smaller footprint, “live simply” self, and my “the kids deserve the joy that materialism so easily delivers”, acquisitive, affluenza-suffering self war with each other.

Especially during birthdays, and holidays. During these special days I, like every other conscious consumer, enter the battlefield of who to buy for, what to buy, and why? And, most importantly, HOW?

For your consideration, some guidelines I came up with for my own conscious and compassionate consumerism:

1. Remember that every dollar is a vote. When you spend, you are voting for the survival of one “contender” over another. You’re contributing to the policies, and politics, of the corporation you buy from. Choose accordingly.

2. Locally owned companies need your support to stay afloat. So, keep chain store gift buying to a bare-minimum. If you’re going to spend your “hard-earned” cash, spend it where it helps the most.

3. Gift with products and services you believe in. Organic cotton socks may be out of your price range ($50 for five pairs? Yikes!), but, see # 4.

4. Buy products and services produced and offered by people you know. You probably know a lot of really great folks, doing really great things. Artists and artisans, musicians, writers, massage therapists and body workers, hairstylists and aestheticians, fix-it guys and gals, coaches, teachers, carpenters, tarot readers, florists.

Instead of an item that may or may not go to waste, why not purchase a gift certificate for a massage, a dollar amount at a local store, a commissioned piece of art from an artist friend, classes, or a glorious spa day? Look at it this way; not many of these are things most of us would buy for ourselves right now. Not with the economy being so bad. So why not feed the “giftees” heart with some gentle R and R, a feast for the soul, or the gift of beauty?

This doesn’t need to be a big expenditure, either. Get a gift certificate for lunch at the locally owned taquería. You’re out ten bux, and your friend is in for a great lunch!

Keep in mind that when you buy from friends, you gift twice. You support your friend in her or his commitment to “right livelihood”, and you give a quality, personal gift to the recipient.

5. Attempt to fully and presently give the gift of yourself. Relax into the experience of it, stay present in the joy of times shared with loved ones. Light candles to welcome the return of the Sun.

6. Become conscious of your judgments, and let them go. This is a very personal suggestion that you may relate to; one of my biggest challenges to staying present in gifting is my judgments about consumerism, and the wastefulness that especially the bigger holidays bring; light displays, wrapping paper, extra driving, extra buying, extra spending. And with the more minor holidays being amped, this complaint no longer belongs just to Christmas time.

My voice of judgment rings out in response to my own holiday habits – which at times veer into excess, over-extension, stress. It can be overwhelming to stay conscious in the midst of it. So, I try to relax my judgment towards myself and others. Judgment is not compassion.

7. Meditate on the longing, the need, the hunger that the shadow-side of WANT inspires, and allow it to pass. Again, and again, and again. Feel it, and let it go. Recognize it in your own desires to care for, and to be cared for, and find acceptance and love for the hungry parts of you. Notice it in others, and generate compassionate understanding.

Just as with any face of compassion, conscious, compassionate consumerism is a practice. It’s a practice I undertake for my own benefit, and the benefit of all sentient beings.

These are my steps to compassionate consumerism. What are yours?

Support an independent business person; ME!!!

Tarot Readings with Lasara – Gfit Certificates holiday special!

Register a loved one for the Sexy Witch Teleclass experience!!!


January, 2013; A LOCAL, IN-PERSON SEXY WITCH COURSE? YOU can make this happen. Local? Register now.


Other holiday themed articles:
Of Dark Nights and Wood Stoves – A Christmas Reminiscence
Compassionate Consumerism
Reframing Your Family’s Recesssion Anxiety to Conscious Consumerism
Five Ways to Engage Your Kids in Grateful Giving

The Answer to the Season’s Biggest Question; Yes, Santa IS Real!

When it comes to the delicate matter of belief, there are creative ways to answer our children’s questions without taking the magic out of life.

When my oldest daughter was about five, she asked whether Santa Claus was real. Her dad and I told her that Santa is real — to those who believe.

Is love real? Is hope real? Is magic real? Is faith real? Is God? We can’t touch or see any of these things, but most of us believe in at least a few of them. In some cases, we can feel them. In others, we may see proof of them appearing in the physical world.

I believe in Christmas miracles. I believe that Mystics speak with God. I believe that Tibetan lamas reincarnate with full recall of their previous lives. I believe in our ability to do good in the world, with each conscious choice we make. I believe in faeries, and faerie tales, pookas, ghosts, saints, and goblins. I believe in a power omnipresent and indivisible.

And, I still believe in Santa Claus. I always will. Just like I believe in God, with Its ineffability, and the many faces It wears.

Jitterbug Perfume by Tim Robbins has one of the best descriptions I’ve seen of the human relationship with deity. The premise is this: the gods depend upon our belief in them to survive. Our belief in the gods is what makes them real.

The power of belief is an important gift we must instruct and safeguard in our children. Belief is what we build our lives upon. Without belief, we may be cast adrift on an endless, meaningless sea. Belief offers a rudder when nothing else can help us find our way.

At 11, my oldest daughter started the Christmas season by saying she no longer believed in Santa. And then complained when she didn’t feel the Christmas Spirit flooding her as we trimmed the tree.

I talked to her about faith.

The fact is, sometimes it’s hard to have faith that Santa will come. I’ll admit it; even I have been known to test The Spirit from time to time. My first Christmas post-divorce I made such a test.

That year it was hard to find my belief in the Spirit of Christmas. I had no one to give my Christmas list to. No one to tell what I hoped to find under the tree. I prayed to the universe to enforce my faith. I wanted proof that Santa was still real.

I wanted indoor/outdoor, “Ugg” knock-off slippers. I know, it’s kind of petty. Slippers? But it was what I wanted. Sometimes, especially in the midst of doubt, fear, and sadness, it’s the little things that matter. Cozy feet on a lonely morning. A small gift out of nowhere.

It was a deal between me and The Spirit, and since I had asked, The Spirit knew exactly what was required to validate my faith.

Come Christmas day, I was gifted a pair of slippers.

That Christmas, Santa showed up as my sister. She didn’t get the slippers for me, but for another family member. When the slippers didn’t fit the quickly growing girl, my sister asked me to take them instead; she didn’t want to go to the trouble of carrying them home on the plane and exchanging them.

I whispered a thank you to Santa, and reminded myself that sometimes He works in mysterious ways; I didn’t know my sister was bringing slippers for the nieces. She didn’t know I wanted them, either. But Santa did. And He delivered.

Throughout my life I’ve seen innumerable miracles of Christmas faith occur, large and small.

I was 14 when my father left the family. That year Christmas looked bleak. There were five mouths to feed, and no “extra”money to be found. We had a “Charlie Brown tree” cut from a stand of fir trees on our own land, and bedecked with ornaments from Christmases past. We were fortunate enough to have food in the cupboard. But my mother was devastated knowing there was no way she would be able to provide Christmas gifts for all of us.

As the eldest, I was privy to the goings-on of the adult world. But to this day, I don’t have any idea who brought Santa that year. All I know is that on Christmas Eve a jolly, bespectacled  man with a beard of white and suit of red pulled into our very remote, country driveway in his sleigh — or rather, his worn, old, white pick-up truck — with bags filled with festively wrapped gifts. There was a name on each one.

Santa left the bags on our porch. With a jolly smile he offered a “Merry Christmas!”, and was on his way.

In 2007 my Christmas Miracle was the grandest The Spirit of Christmas has yet conspired to deliver for me; the man I’ve been waiting my whole life to find traversed mountain and river that stormy December to be by my side and spend the holidays with me and the children.

That Christmas I felt like both Doris and little Susan in Miracle on 34th Street; the home, the family, the life that I had been nearly afraid to desire became my greatest Christmas miracle. Now every holiday season is a celebration of that most profound of miracles; the emergence of a love perfect and complete.

For me, the holidays will continue for the rest of our lives. My faith in the Miracle of Christmas is no longer shakable. No more tests required – I finally got my ultimate proof.  The man of my dreams, now my husband, is here to stay.

Some would say it was just a fluke of timing. And there’s something to that; finding The One is a miracle whenever it happens. But to me, it was more than just a twist of circumstance that this relationship arrived wrapped in a  Christmas ribbon. For me, it’s further proof that when we open ourselves to the possibility that magic exists, magic proves itself real.

Receiving the Miracles, while amazing, heart-expanding, and at times even life-saving, are only one side of the Christmas Miracle coin. The other side is the one where we become the manifestation of The Spirit. Through our agency, miracles are made manifest.

Movies are built on the theme of The Christmas Miracle. In this case, art imitates life. Christmas stories with their grand, sweeping, soaring themes serve as a reminder of what’s possible when we allow ourselves to invest in love and faith. And as believing becomes more effortless, the miracles grow larger.

Off the screen, food banks fill for at least one day with more than enough to feed the local hungry. People open their homes to strangers so they will have somewhere to be on Christmas morning. Communities pull together and provide gifts for children who would otherwise have been without.

To quote the words of song writer Red West, popularized by Elvis, “if every day could be just like Christmas, what a wonderful world this would be.”

It’s been proven to me again and again through personal experience that the Holiday Spirit does exist. I have been both the one who receives and the one who delivers on the promise of hope that the season offers.

As a Mystic mama, I don’t feel like a hypocrite or a liar, or as though I’m misleading my children by allowing them to believe in a power that makes their child-lives a little more happy, a little more bountiful, a little more hopeful, a little more magical.

And as they grow older, The Spirit need not disappear for our children. Instead of losing heart at the news that Santa is a myth — or a god, or a spirit, or a force — faith may continue to flourish. Given the chance to become part of the spirit of Saint Nick, children can become an active part of that energy of selfless giving. They will become the ones who enact the miracles of the season. In learning about the true meaning of the Spirit of generosity and kindness, they grow to be the hearts and bodies that offer those miracles up.

Back to my daughter as a proof of the shift that may occur with proper shifting of the dynamic of belief; when she was 12, she and I started the holiday season by clearing out all of our excess belongings; warm coats, bedding, clothes that would make a person feel happy to wear, some toys, and taking them to a homeless services center in our town. She was adamant about not only wanting to participate in the gathering up of the items, but also in participating in the process of dropping the boxes off at the center.

Together, we took three large, heaping boxes of items that would brighten the season for people we would never meet, and dropped them off with a group of people who had dedicated their lives to helping the generally unseen members of our community – all year round.

That office is gone now – closed due to lack of funding. But our ability to pull together and deliver Miracles is not. For us it has become a more personal offering. Buying food for a hungry person sitting outside a grocery store. Carrying give-away items in the back of the car and offering them to people in need. Listening to the stories of those who have ended up on the street. Recognizing a person; making him or her seen, if only for the duration of the conversation.

The gratitude returned is a larger gift than any other.

The Spirit is palpable. It acts in the world. Whether you call it the power of faith, or Jesus, or Santa Claus, or generosity, it’s a reminder of a bond of love for our fellow man.

Regardless of the name we give it, it sustains. If we allow it to, if we believe it will, The Spirit acts through and for each of us, bringing miracles to bear.

RECOMMENDED ACTIVITIES:
1. Itemize memories of Christmas miracles – offered and received – in your own life.
2. Practice a random act of holiday cheer.
3. Find a way to “give back” to your community. Or pay it forward. Or however you look at it.
4. Be someone’s Santa.
5. Involve your child or children in these activities.

Other holiday themed articles:
Of Dark Nights and Wood Stoves – A Christmas Reminiscence
Compassionate Consumerism
Reframing Your Family’s Recesssion Anxiety to Conscious Consumerism
Five Ways to Engage Your Kids in Grateful Giving

Support an independent business person; ME!!!

Tarot Readings with Lasara – Gfit Certificates holiday special!

Register a loved one for the Sexy Witch Teleclass experience!!!


January, 2013; A LOCAL, IN-PERSON SEXY WITCH COURSE? YOU can make this happen. Local? Register now.

Happy Holidays! Stay Grateful, Gracious, and Green!

Gift Buying with Consciousness – A Guide to Compassionate Consumerism

Often my anti-consumerist, smaller footprint, “live simply” self, and my “the kids deserve the joy that materialism so easily delivers”, acquisitive, affluenza-suffering self war with each other.

Especially during birthdays, and holidays. During these special days I, like every other conscious consumer, enter the battlefield of who to buy for, what to buy, and why? And, most importantly, HOW?

For your consideration, some guidelines I came up with for my own conscious and compassionate consumerism… read more here…

Tarot Readings with Lasara – Gfit Certificates holiday special!

Register a loved one for the Sexy Witch Teleclass experience!!!

Finding Light in the Darkness – The Reason for the Season

The celebration of this season has roots in the timeless, hidden promise of light and warmth that lives within the dark. Even after the longest night of the year is over, winter still holds sway. But the light does begin its ascent to grandeur and glory in the eternal procession of seasons. …read more here…

Self Care for the Holiday Season

The holidays are upon us. No matter what your spiritual persuasion, you’re probably going to be finding time within this season of cold days and long nights to gather with family and friends, sit around the feast table, and celebrate some light in the darkness. What a wonderful thing!

But even so, the most joyful season still comes with holiday stress. And, between travel, shopping, parties, and family commitments, many of us don’t take very good care of ourselves in the midst of it all. During the holidays, most of us eat more – and more poorly. We exercise less. We let our spiritual practices slip. I mean, who has time to meditate? There’s a sale on, and I still have gifts to buy! (Right?)

The result; physical, mental, and emotional exhaustion. …read more here…

Arise Then, Women of This Day – The Roots of Mother’s Day

Did you know that Mother’s Day was created as an opportunity to stand against war?

Here is the first stanza of a piece of writing called The Mothers’ Day Proclamation written by Julia Ward Howe, a feminist and abolitionist, in 1870.

Arise, then, women of this day!
Arise, all women who have hearts,
Whether our baptism be of water or of tears!
Say firmly:
“We will not have great questions decided by irrelevant agencies,
Our husbands will not come to us, reeking with carnage, for caresses and applause.
Our sons shall not be taken from us to unlearn
All that we have been able to teach them of charity, mercy and patience.
We, the women of one country, will be too tender of those of another country
To allow our sons to be trained to injure theirs.”

You can see the rest of the Mother’s Day Proclamation here – it’s full of thoughts as relevant today as they were over a hundred years ago when it was written.

As you take some time to reflect on the contributions mothers have made the world over, think on one of the most precious; life. And another element so strongly the bedrock of what we think of as motherhood; love. Let life and love stand as sacred in our personal days and nights, and take a moment in it all to take a stand for both.

May the suffering cease. May the wars end. May the human family live in peace.

Lent: A How-To for Mystics

(Reprinted from Elephant Journal. First publication 3/8/11.)

I am not, nor have I ever been, your typical Christian. Most wouldn’t even call me Christian, though I would say my spiritual reality is very catholic (small “c” intentional) and I do have my own special relationship with Christ.

I am in no way claiming to be your spiritual adviser in these things. As a Mystic, you most likely draw from many faiths as I do, finding merit in each. Religion is a veil gracing the heart of what prayer and spiritual practice offer. (You say thief, I say liberator!)

As a Mystic you are also your own Priest, and therefore vested with the power to administer your own sacramentals. (I say Mystic, you say heretic!)

As with any spiritual under taking, intention is everything. So in choosing the way you want to observe Lent, remember that it’s not the destination that matters, but the journey. In other words, it’s not about “making it to Easter”, it’s about learning from the experience.

1. Basics of Lent: Lent is the 40-day period between Ash Wednesday (in this case, March 9) and Holy Thursday. Holy Thursday is the end of Lent, and the beginning of the three holy days of Easter.

2. Three Pillars: There are three pillars of Lent in traditional Catholicism. The pillars are fasting, prayer, and alms-giving. The basic premise of these spiritual undertakings

a. Fasting isn’t really about not eating, it’s about what you learn from not eating, or how you allow not eating to alter your perception. It can also be about allowing yourself temporary liberation from the cycle of eat-or-be-eaten, getting really high on just your breath, or allowing yourself the space to allow for worship to become a higher order of priority than bodily needs.

Spiritual fasting is a varied experience. People do it for all kinds of reasons, and get all kinds of results. I recommend that as you fast, you noticing your hunger. Experience your hunger as the hunger of that Rumi had for conversation with Shamz. That Teresa of Avila had for Christ.

b. Prayer is an adjunct to spiritual fasting that makes the whole more than the sum of its parts. When the energy of hunger is turned to a fevered devotion, prayer becomes a love song to God.

c. Alms-giving is a way to make the concept of sacrifice foundational and interactive. What are you willing to give up in order to benefit the lives of those around you? In your chosen hunger are you willing to feed with your food those who don’t choose hunger? Are you willing to offer your time, energy and intention to putting the words “love your neighbor” into action?

3. How-To, for the Mystic:

a. Ash Wednesday: “Remember, O man, that you are dust, and unto dust you shall return.” —Genesis 3:19.

Ash Wednesday is the day when you see Catholics walking around with ash crosses on their foreheads. You, as your own Priest, will want to prepare a mixture of ash and water or oil. The ash can be from a piece of paper with a “sin” you’d like to eradicate written on it.

Once cool take the ash, make the paste, and paint a cross on your forehead with the ash, recognizing your willingness to bow before the Will of the power greater than yourself.

b. Build Your Lent: How much do you want to fast? What do you want to abstain from? What are you willing to tithe or offer up?Will you fast with water only? Bread and water? One single meal? Any of these options, or even less stringent undertakings such as eating lightly, forgoing meat, or forgoing other foods you enjoy. Or even foods you just eat habitually.

How do you want to enact the teachings of Christ?

This is not about the sacrifice that Christ made, but about the sacrifices you are willing to make in order to become more Christ-like. What actions can you surrender, and what actions can you commit to that will allow the light of Christ to flourish within you?

c. Holy Thursday, aka Thursday of Mysteries. Now it’s about Christ. This is a commemoration of the Last Supper.

After the last super was that night under the olive trees in the Garden of Gethsemane. “Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done.” Reflect upon the Sacrifice that Christ was facing. What cup of poison are you shying away from? Will you take the cup, or will you flee?

Spend this night in reflection of what’s being asked of you by God.

d. Holy Friday is a commemoration of the crucifixion of Christ. Traditionally this is a day of fasting and mourning. If you really want to go for it you could spend Friday dressed in sack-cloth and covered in ashes, or taking a more direct and experiential connection with the Passion of the Christ, spend a in a cave wrapped in nothing but a shroud.

e. The Easter Vigil begins Saturday evening. You may take Saturday as another fasting day, clearing the ash and dust from your soul, until evening which is the officially the beginning of Holy Sunday, or…

f. Resurrection Day! You’ve made it! Don’t you feel great? What have you been reborn to, aside from the love of Christ? Or, in addition to it? Eat, drink, and be merry, bathed in the Light of Love and Rebirth!

I hope you have enjoyed your journey through this Mystic’s guide to Lent. May it provide good food – and fast – for thought. Amen.

Lent: A How-To for Mystics at Elephant.

Read my latest at Elephant Journal, Lent; A How-To for Mystics, TODAY!

Excerpt:

I am not, nor have I ever been, your typical Christian. Most wouldn’t even call me Christian, though I would say my spiritual reality is very catholic (small “c” intentional) and I do have my own special relationship with Christ.

I am in no way claiming to be your spiritual adviser in these things. As a Mystic, you most likely draw from many faiths as I do, finding merit in each. Religion is a veil gracing the heart of what prayer and spiritual practice offer. (You say thief, I say liberator!)

As a Mystic you are also your own Priest, and therefore vested with the power to administer your own sacramentals. (I say Mystic, you say heretic!)

As with any spiritual under taking, intention is everything. So in choosing the way you want to observe Lent, remember that it’s not the destination that matters, but the journey. In other words, it’s not about “making it to Easter”, it’s about learning from the experience.

Read the rest NOW at Elephant! Enjoy, and peace be with you.

Looking Forward to 2011!

Looking Forward to 2011!

(Instead of Resolutions, Try Dedications, Intentions, and WHY NOTs Instead.)

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Dedications:

Self:

  • To keep working toward my best over-all health:
    • Exercise.
    • Diet.
    • Rest and Relaxation.
    • Meditation.
    • Mental health hygiene.
    • To listen to my body.
  • To be gentle with myself.
  • To continue deepening my spiritual practice.
  • To continue falling more and more into alignment with my soul/sole purpose.
  • To prioritize my creative and professional life, in balance with personal and familial care.
  • To welcome the big 4 – 0 with open arms!
  • To continue teaching, writing, and doing my work in the world.

Family:

  • To HAVE FUN together!
  • To spend regular, dedicated quality time with my man.
  • To spend regular, dedicated quality time with each of my girls.
  • To spend quality time with my girls, as a unit of three.
  • To create more intentional, shared family time.
  • To do fun fitness things together.
  • To socialize more as a family.
  • To remember to give gifts of time, words, touch, things, and love to my loved ones.
  • To celebrate all the important family holidays, commemorations, anniversaries, and notable events with mindfulness, joy, and non-attachment.

Community:

  • To continue with my grateful giving projects – and to share that experience with others, including family and friends.
    • Blanket, socks, and jacket drive.
    • Project Pizza
    • ???
  • To continue finding and fostering new friendships.
  • To continue renewing and deepening relationships with old friends.
  • To make space for social time, and follow through with intentionality.

Intentions:

  • To take life less seriously, and have more ease.
  • To continue embracing “balanced” and “normal” as positives in my personal experience.
  • To allow my ‘platform’ to shift into this alignment, with me.
  • To welcome even more wealth, and more joy and ease in the having and sharing of it.
  • To reintroduce daily yoga practice into my life.
  • To rededicate myself to sitting meditation practice.
  • To share yoga and meditation with my kids and man more.
  • To create spaces for community to gather for fun and enrichment.
  • To re-introduce teaching and facilitating face-to-face in my work.
  • To spend more time taking little trips with the Mr., and with the family.
  • To finally complete a new book.

Why Not???:

  • Plan and budget for me and the Mr.’s belated honeymoon?
  • Finally get certified as a yoga instructor?
  • Get certified as a Zumba! teacher?
  • Pitch some of the big-name websites, like Huffington Post, Psychology Today…?

Thank you for being part of my circle, and witnessing me on the path. And thank you for allowing me to do the same for you. (Please post some of your dedications in the comments section below!)

May the coming year bring all of our sweetest dreams to flower and fruit. Peace, love, health, and wealth to you in this new year of a new decade!
-Lasara

A New – Or POST – New Year’s Tradition; Give Up Resolutions!

— It’s Never Too Late to Try Dedications, Intentions, and WHY NOTs!

by Lasára Allen, www.LasaraAllen.com

Are you planning on making any resolutions for the coming year?

Many of us make New Year’s resolutions – and then fail. A whopping 88% of well-meaning New Year’s revelers will “fail” in achieving the resolutions they set out as a goal at 12:01 AM, January 1st.

Though I have almost always met with success in my new year’s resolutions, I think resolutions come from a somewhat limited, and limiting, perspective. So instead of resolutions his year, I’ve chosen to make lists of Dedications, Intentions and WHY NOTs.

But always with any commitment I make, New Year’s or otherwise, I include one cautionary caveat, which I encourage you to adopt as well; remember that while any marker – New Year’s day, the new moon, an anniversary, or your birthday – can serve as an activator for a commitment, every breath is a chance for a new choice.

When you “fall short” of a commitment, offer yourself compassion instead of self-denigration. Gratitude for a lesson learned instead of self-blame.

It helps me to think of my dedications, intentions, and wishes (my WHY NOT list) as practices. For me, practice means that though I’m not perfect at it (that’s why it’s called practice, right?), I can grow more committed to my practice every day, or even every moment.

“I can grow more committed to my practice every moment.” I find this a great phrase, prayer, or mantra to remember as needed.

In the list structure I’ve designed, each list category has a descending, or higher to lower, level of commitment. 1: Dedications; 2: Intentions; 3; The “WHY NOT?” List.

Here’s a quick, easy guide on how to build these lists, and a few examples per category.

List One; Dedications:

The Mirriam-Webster Dictionary offers four definitions for the word dedication.

1 : an act or rite of dedicating to a divine being or to a sacred use, 2 : a devoting or setting aside for a particular purpose, 3 : a name and often a message prefixed to a literary, musical, or artistic production in tribute to a person or cause, 4 : self-sacrificing devotion <her dedication to the cause>, 5 : a ceremony to mark the official completion or opening of something…

I think all of these definitions have relevance here. Dedications are like vows that I’m making with God, my family, my community, the flow of life in general. And my life in specific. Of the three lists described here, this one carries the highest level of commitment.

In building this list think of the things you truly are committed to enacting in your everyday life. Consider the ways you want your life to shift, the relationships you will reconfigure, the people you are responsible for or to.

Then set pen to paper (or fingers to keyboard, as case may be), and get writing. You can write out as many or as few as feels right. If your list gets too long, you can number each item by level of importance or resonance, and cut the ones that rank lowest.

Here are a few examples:

* To recognize that every area of my practice is an act of dedication to the liberation of all sentient beings pervading time and space.
* To recognize that mindfully and selflessly being of service to my husband, my children, my family, my friends, and my community is an inherent part of my spiritual practice, and to treat it as such. And, to remember that this is also a practice that engenders the attitudes of enlightenment that will lead eventually to the liberation of all beings.
* To continue following the path that my practices open for me.
* To build a circle of similarly minded friends in my community, and to actively commit to this as a practice of faith, desire, and love.
* To continue trusting that God has a plan for me that is greater than I can see, and that everyday I’m fulfilling that plan by living my life in accordance with my True Will, and with as much consciousness as I am capable of achieving.

List Two; Intentions

Mirriam-Webster has six definitions of the word intention. Of the six, I feel that the following five are all interestingly relevant in this case.

1 : a determination to act in a certain way : resolve, 2 : import, significance, 3 a : what one intends to do or bring about b : the object for which a prayer, mass, or pious act is offered, 4 : a process or manner of healing of incised wounds, 5 : concept; especially : a concept considered as the product of attention directed to an object of knowledge…

And here’s the etymology, thanks to etymonline.com;

intend c.1300, “direct one’s attention to,” from O.Fr. intendre “to direct one’s attention,” from L. intenderein- “toward” + tendere “to stretch” (see tenet). Sense of “have as a plan” (1390) was present in Latin. A Gmc. word for this was ettle, from O.N. ætla “to think, conjecture, propose,” from P.Gmc. *ahta “consideration, attention” (cf. O.E. eaht, Ger. acht). …

Intentions are thoughts, experiences and occurrences that you are casting forward into your future. Intentions may not take as much day-to-day attention, or may not be as interactive with others in your life. Whatever they are, for me they often have a lot to do with feeling-states and the outcomes of them.

Some examples of Intentions list items:

* To allow perfect abundance to enter into and flow in my life, and to have less attachment about how that flow occurs. To trust that God knows best how to deliver this abundance.
* To follow the attraction and direction of my heart with grace, trust, and joy.
* To invest in and develop forgiveness for myself and the harm that occurred in my past.
* More and more, to allow the support I so deeply desire.
* To take what I have learned of trust, honesty, and openness from my husband and begin generalizing it to the rest of the world.

List 3; The “WHY NOT?” List:

I got the idea for a WHY NOT list from Self Magazine actually. I thought it sounded like a great idea – to give myself the chance to dream big, and think outside the daily details of family, plans, life, family, service, love, did I mention family?

WHY NOT take a few minutes and get very self-focused?If you could do anything, what would it be? And remember, anything you truly desire, you most likely can pull off.

In my life I have found so much inspiration from people who have come up against challenges and beat the odds; a man with a prosthetic leg finishing a marathon in just over five hours. My dad being diagnosed with cancer and, instead of succumbing, actually choosing to live for the first time in his life. My sister, an amazing woman summited Mount Everest in her mid-40s.

This resilience and willingness to strive relies so much on a WHY NOT? attitude.

Even if you don’t complete all of them, just the willingness to reach for your WHY NOTs guarantees that you’ll have a great time in the coming year, and beyond.

Some of my WHY NOTs:

* Work toward my best comprehensive health in my life.
* Explore new religions. (Catholicism, traditional Tantra, deeper into Tibetan Buddhism and Tantric teachings and ritual.)
* Explore excavation of darkness and shadow, in the light.
* Go dancing.
* Take a dance class.
* Take a voice class

And, my final commitment; to view these lists at least once every three months, and mark off the things that actually have a completion point, and put stars next to the things I’m doing well with that are paths without destinations.

An often suggested tip that will help you keep to your commitments is the creation of an accountability system. This may be a one-on-one buddy system, a group, or even a public declaration with sceduled check in days. Share your Dedications, Intentions, and WHAT IFs with people who care, people who believe in you, people who will support you in your desired growth. And you can offer the same support back.

If you feel brave, you can allow this page to be part of YOUR accountability system. Feel free to post some (or all) of your Dedications, Intentions, and WHAT IFs in the comments section below.

With wishes of joy, abundance, and greatest gratitude, a very heartfelt prayer for a New Year that is beyond your sweetest dreams, from my heart to yours.

New Year’s Lazer Coaching Sessions – Start the New Year with focus and direction! * Mind, Body, Spirit Program – Three Week Program that will get your started on your path for 2011

Self-Care for the Holiday Season

The holidays are upon us. No matter what your spiritual persuasion, you’re probably going to be finding time within this season of cold days and long nights to gather with family and friends, sit around the feast table, and celebrate some light in the darkness. What a wonderful thing!

But even so, the most joyful season still comes with holiday stress. And, between travel, shopping, parties, and family commitments, many of us don’t take very good care of ourselves in the midst of it all. During the holidays, most of us eat more – and more poorly. We exercise less. We let our spiritual practices slip. I mean, who has time to meditate? There’s a sale on, and I still have gifts to buy! (Right?)

The result; physical, mental, and emotional exhaustion.

In addition to the basic stressors listed above, the holidays are the loneliest time of the year for many. Depression rates increase in the darker months, and many people experience physical and psychological ills when faced with the prospect of gathering with family. (Ever heard of the Christmas Migraine? It’s a real thing.)

For a change, why not make a pre-New Year’s resolution? Dedicate yourself to defeating the stress and depression many of us associate with this time of year, before it even happens.

Remember your own self-care, and the rest will come easily; pleasure, enjoyment, and a healthful indulgence in the more lovely aspects of the season.

1. Eat With a Plan

The magic of the holidays doesn’t change the exercise/calories ratio. So, as usual, the more you exercise, the more calories you can take in without weight gain.

New studies show that though the amount of weight gained during the holidays is less than was assumed – around 1 pound gained between Thanksgiving the New Years – the weight gain is often long-lasting, if not permanent. On average, body weight in women increases by 5.2 percent in ten years. How much of that is holiday gain? It’s unclear. But, holiday munching is one culprit you can limit the power of by eating consciously, and entering the season with a plan.

If you’re in relatively good shape, your plan should include healthy eating choices, and balancing exercise with caloric intake. Don’t get neurotic about it, but pay attention. If your weight is already a health concern, your plan should be more intensive. And again, exercise is key to happy, healthy, guilt-free eating.

2. Exercise

Exercise keeps your weight down, and your heart healthy. As mentioned above, your holiday health plan must include exercise! There are many excellent reasons to include a solid dose of cardio in your regular plans. One reason, of course, is the exercise/calorie ratio. One pound of weight=3500 calories. So, as you keep track of your intake, you can tally, and exercise as needed to balance the indulgences.

Exercise is also a great treatment for depression, stress, anxiety, and seasonal affective disorder. According to a study published in the American Journal of Preventive Medicine in 2005, exercise is as effective as antidepressant medication for treating mild to moderate depression.

It’s also helpful in the treatment of Seasonal Affective Disorder. For treatment to be most effective, perform moderately intense cardio – exercise bike, treadmill, or other aerobic activity – for 30 – 35 minutes a day, 3 – 5 days a week.

If you’re on antidepressants, exercise is wonderful as a complimentary measure.

3. Take a Break

Take time to slow down. Relax into the rhythm that your body gravitates to in this dark time. Sit in the bathtub. Meditate. Pray. Greet the dark, and let it heal you.

Don’t forget to make time for sleep.

4. Spend Time with Those Closest to You:

In my little family, we plan our relaxation into the calendar, holidays or not. We plan chill time, family movie nights, and my husband and I religiously observe Tuesday evening as our date night.

Find some rituals that make sense to your and yours. Plan in and enjoy closeness with those near and dear in these coldest and darkest of days and nights. Tell and listen to stories. Watch the classic holiday films. Do crafts together.

5. Remember the Heart of What’s Most Important To You About the Season

What’s your favorite thing about the season? Is it friends, family, and gatherings? Who got or gave the greatest gift? Wassail and carols? Feeding the hungry? The lights and trees and sparkly things?

Whatever brings you joy make sure to keep it front and center. Focus on delight. Build your holiday around the parts that you, and those you love, find most important. It goes a long way toward keeping your holiday sane, sweet, and meaningful.

Need some help with your New Year’s Goals?

Sign up for Lasara’s Three-Week Mind, Body, and Spirit Renewal Program!

Baby, It’s Cold Outside – A Very Groovy Christmas Collection

Happy holidays! Enjoy this fun and funky Christmas mix!

Holiday themed articles:
Of Dark Nights and Wood Stoves – A Christmas Reminiscence
Compassionate Consumerism
Reframing Your Family’s Recesssion Anxiety to Conscious Consumerism
Five Ways to Engage Your Kids in Grateful Giving

Support an independent business person; ME!!!

Tarot Readings with Lasara – Gfit Certificates holiday special!

Register a loved one for the Sexy Witch Teleclass experience!!!


January, 2013; A LOCAL, IN-PERSON SEXY WITCH COURSE?
YOU can make this happen. Local? Register now.

Thanks and Thanksgiving – Gratitude is a Gift, and so is Remembrance

Most of us know something about the far-from-glorious fall-out that followed that first, mythical “Thanksgiving Day”. It’s easy enough to get attached to the negative political connotations of this holiday, and to have Thanksgiving become “Guiltfast” or “Guiltfest”.

In no way do I want to belittle the horror and carnage that followed the “founding of a new land” (new to whom?) as manifest destiny was used as an ideological weapon that allowed the settlers to push westward, killing and being killed, and irrevocably changing the fabric of a nation forever.

The inarguable atrocities occurred for hundreds of years, and continue to this day. The Trail of Tears (or, “Nunna dual Tsuni” in the Cherokee language; The Trail Where They Cried)“Americanization” of Native peoples. Broken treaties.

However, we can also believe – or at least hope against hope – that there was, once upon a time, that first gathering of thanksgiving, where the newcomers, out of a deep sense of gratitude and recognition, invited the native people to share a feast with them in thanks for the help that had allowed the settlers to survive their early days in a new land.

This coming together of openhearted and grateful sharing is the spirit I attempt to enter into the holiday with. This, and the belief that it’s worth dedicating at least one day out of the year to the practice of gratitude.

Thanksgiving day does not need to be a political statement. I’ll go even further and say that though the institutionalization of the federal holiday may have originally been a political move, the observation of the holiday has become one of that is patently apolitical. And while the original wording of the proclamations that the Thanksgiving holiday is built upon were Christian in intent, the observation has become more or less secular.

Today, for most Americans, the spirit of Thanksgiving is one of inclusion. Pagans, and even Atheists celebrate Thanksgiving. It’s a chance to take inventory of our lives, an opportunity to consciously reflect upon and share the things we are truly grateful for with friends and family. And a time to indulge in the fruits of our harvests – literal or metaphoric – by way of a large feast, often brought together in a stone-soup or potluck manner.

Like so many of the celebrations of the darkening season, this feast is both a recognition of bounty, and a practice of faith. Faith that through shared abundance, there’s no winter that will be hard enough that we don’t get through it. And at the basic, beautiful, mundanely rooted nature of it, the actual bounty is in no way metaphoric, but is wholly celebratory.

Perhaps somewhere in these days leading up to the holiday you’ll take some time to reflect on the history of the native people of these lands, because this dark side of the history of this nation should never be forgotten – and all too often, it is.

Perhaps you will educate your children about the shadows that dwell behind the images of Pilgrims and turkeys that adorn their classrooms, because their teachers are not going to. Maybe you’ll take a moment of silent prayer, or maybe even shared prayer, in recognition of the hidden history of the Indian Wars and the cultural genocide of the native peoples of this country before (or even at) your Thanksgiving gathering – because until there’s a federally recognized Indigenous People’s Day proclaimed, this is one of the few days out of the year that reminds us of our national shadow history.

And, maybe the awareness of what you’re grateful for will serve as a reminder to offer what you can to those who have less.

And, I hope you’ll begin counting your blessings. Because once you begin counting, you won’t be able to stop.

On Thanksgiving, you have an opportunity to recognize not just the bounty of your table piled high and your cup running over, but also the wealth of community, family, and abundance of all forms. And the more conscious you become of what it is that you’re grateful for, the deeper your experience of the holiday of Thanksgiving will be.

Some Thanksgiving Fun and Games:

A Gratitude Round Robin – Gratitude Games * A Grateful A to Z – A Gratitude Game for Kids of All Ages

Read My Other Gratitude and Thanksgiving Related Posts:

Five Ways to Engage Your Kids in Grateful Giving * How to Create a Gratitude Altar * The Benefits of Gratitude in Family Life *

A Grateful A – Z — A Gratitude Game for Kids of All Ages

When I was a kid, we played alphabet games in the car to pass the time on long drives or road trips. I’ve recreated one of those games, with a gratitude theme. A Grateful A to Z includes players of all ages – from talking age up.

A Grateful A to Z is an adaptable game. Variations are listed below. For young players, A Grateful A to Z serves two purposes; it teaches both language skills and gratitude! And, with older players, there are ways to make A Grateful A to Z more complicated.

You can choose a category, or allow A Grateful A to Z to be free-form. Free-form is recommended for younger players, and is easier than working with a category. Themes or categories are recommended for more advanced players.

1. Definition of terms:

a. “Round” is a go-around where everyone in a group gives their answer to the category, or passes.

b. “Round-Leader” is the facilitator of the round. This position transitions at the conclusion of each round. The role of round leader can go to the person who wants it next, or you can pass the role in the round, either to the left or right. If a player does not want to be a round leader, they can pass.

2. Basic Guidelines:

a. The main rule is: Answer from gratitude. Be GRATEFUL!

b. Never force, cajole, or pressure any player into responding to any prompt. “Pass” is always an acceptable response.

c. Always give the person who is offering their gratitude the floor. Do not interrupt, question, or quiet them. If you’re playing this as a family, it’s especially important that you allow one another the full range of voice.

Remember, you can print out these directions, or you can upload them to your palm-top and not print at all. Please keep your “footprint” in mind when considering your options.

Variations and Detailed Guidelines:

A Grateful A – Z, Freeform:
The round leader starts a round with the phrase “I’m grateful for…”, and chooses anything starting with an A. The round leader can pass the prompt either to the right or left. The round ends when the alphabet ends. You can make it more complicated by offering a “no repeats” guideline.

A Grateful A – Z, with Themes:
Round leader comes up with a theme – people you’re grateful for, things you’re grateful for, inventions you’re grateful for.

Enjoy playing A Grateful A to Z with your family this holiday season!

Eid al-Adha Mubarak!

Happy festival to you! If you made Hajj this year, mabruk! Alhamdulillah.

For those of you who are not Muslim, I offer a link to a “controversial” article I wrote in honor of Ramadan – Seven Things You Probably Didn’t Know About Islam. In honor of the Greater Festival of Islam, I hope it brings us closer to understanding and peaceful coexistence.

Salaam.

Holiday Health: Compassionate Consumerism, and Self-Care.

The holidays are (basically) upon us! Since starting to do the Holiday Season binge-shopping (yeah, me too), I thought I’d offer a link to my article, Gift Buying with Consciousness: A Guide to Compassionate Consumerism.

And, since we’re all prone to losing track of our self-care during the season, I am also linking Self-Care for the Holiday Season.

May the revelry commence! Stay safe, sane, and healthy, as we hurtle toward a brand new year. (Wow! Already?)

Stay tuned for more.

My Grandfather’s Flag

Marcus A. Golczynski, 30, the father of this child, was killed in Iraq on March 27, 2009. "We fight and sometimes die, so our families don't have to."

“…I hope you’ll take a moment to remember, to pray for, all those who have fallen in the lines of fire – not just “our” men and boys, wives and daughters, but all of those who have fallen, everywhere around the world.”
– Written Memorial Day, 2009, and offered again today. My Grandfather’s Flag.

In honor of our LIVING veterans, take some time today to see if there’s anything you can do to pitch in and take care of our walking wounded. For many, the war doesn’t end with the journey home. For some, it never ends.

Let’s support our veterans by bringing them home, and giving them the services they need to recover and come back to their lives as whole people.

It’s a dream, and perhaps a futile one, but I’ll say it; let’s end the wars. Let’s end all wars. Together, let’s pray and work for world peace. Let’s live and love peace. Let’s honor our loved ones who have suffered the effects of war by not having to send their children into battle.

Peace in our hearts, peace in our homes, peace in the world.

A New Generation of Fathers – A Shout-Out to the New Dad

I know very few peers who were raised by both parents. I have very many peers whose fathers were at best absent, and at worst abusive. Though really, abandonment leaves scars nearly as readily as any other kind of abuse does.

Most of us lived through our parent’s divorces as kids. Divorce is as prevalent as it was when I was a child, but there is a new pattern emerging in this generation.

Now we have a new generation of fathers; this is the New Dad.

In my generation, Generation X, the ending of the first marriage (called a “starter marriage” by a friend), feels almost like a rite of passage into true adulthood.

But this generation is writing a new story about what happens after divorce. The New Dads grew up in houses mostly absent of any stable father figure. These men are doing their part in authoring this new ending-as-beginning; they’re sticking around. Even more impressively, they’re working with their baby-mommas to make it possible to co-parent with as much peace and agreement as possible.

This isn’t always an easy task. After all, divorces happen for a reason. Couples grow apart.

Divorce is a more acceptable option for our generation than it was for our parents’ generation. Staunch “family values” types would likely cite this as a proof of a cultural failing.

I prefer to look at the positive side, and say that perhaps because divorce has become more culturally prevalent, and overtime more socially acceptable, it’s become a less destructive option.

As a generation born in the midst of the divorce boom, we learned at least two things thoroughly; divorce is often the right choice (it certainly was in the case of my mom and dad), and divorce is potentially much harder on the kids than it is on the adults involved.

Out of this awareness, we’ve learned 1., that there’s no shame in calling it quits before a functional relationship with the ex is out of the question, and 2., the needs of the kids should always out weigh any pettiness on the part of the adults.

And the New Dad is a product of the divorce boom as well – by merit of the fact that this man was most likely raised primarily (if not exclusively) by his mother. While this is not in all ways a good thing, there are positives that are present.

While the absence of a father figure in a man’s life can lead to confusion about what it means to be a dad, there are a few elements working in the positive, and producing some really beautiful fathering by the men of generations X and Y.

By and large, men raised by their mamas have a lot of respect for the work their moms did to keep them happy, healthy, and taken care of growing up. And, using the absence of their fathers (or in worse cases, the abuse) as an example of how NOT to parent, these New Dads are making new choices.

The New Dad is nurturing, involved, sensitive and engaged with his children. After a separation, this New Dad works hard to create a healthy co-parenting relationship with his ex. In the best case, this manifests as a sense of extended family. In less ideal circumstances, it comes down to putting aside disagreements with the ex in order to create the most positive co-parenting relationship possible.

In the absence of a positive father figure, it’s almost as if the New Dad is starting over with a clean slate. And with that slate in front of him, the New Dad is taking out the sidewalk chalk and sitting down with his kids to draw a brand new image of what being a father means.

Here’s a shout out to all the New Dads; Happy Father’s Day, and THANKS FOR BEING YOU!

For more about kids of divorce, read this cool piece at NPR!

Origins of Halloween: Celtic New Year, Dia de los Muertos. Fun family activities!

Samhain: Celtic

The word Samhain seems to have come from the word samhraidreadh, which in the Gaelic, the language of the Celts, means “summer’s end.” The Celts divided the year up into two parts; the Winter Half, or Dark Half, and the Summer Half, or Light Half. The Celts considered the day as starting with evening, instead of midnight or morning, and so it was with the year. As the Celts went into the darkening season, they went into their new year.

Samhain was a one of the four yearly Fire Festivals celebrated by the Druids of the Celtic lands. These festivals lasted three days, and were celebrated on the seasonal turning points, which were the points between equinoxes and solstices. At the Samhain fire festival, and at it’s cross-point, Beltane, once the community fire was built, all fires in family hearths were let to go out. These two times were the only times during the year that the hearth fire was extinguished. On the final morning of the festival, the head of each house would take embers from the community fire and restart the fire in their hearth.

In the Celtic tradition, the day before Samhain was considered the last day of the old year, and the day after Samhain was considered the first day of the new year. The day of Samhain was considered a time between times, a day between years, and a world between worlds. It was a very magical day.

The Celts believed that Samhain was a time where the world of spirits (where the dead, the faeries and other supernatural beings dwelt) and the world of the living were closest. They believed that the spirits of the dead would come and walk among the living during this festival. Many Celts dressed in costumes of spirits and faeries to make the wandering spirits feel at home.

Often, too, it was the poor of the community who would wonder begging food in the guise of the spirits. And the homesteaders would not want to bring the disfavor of the spirits upon them by acting selfishly. So the hungry would be fed on Samhain, and the ancestors would bring blessings to those who had been generous.

Another aspect of this festival is the story of the Celtic God of Sun and Vegetation, Lugh. Having given-in to wounds received on Mabon (the autumnal equinox) in mid-September, Lugh was believed to die each year during this time. (And each year The Sun God would be reborn on winter solstice.) Lugh was killed by his shadow self and twin, Tanist; the Horned God, the Dark Lord, the Lord of Misrule.

Under the rule of Misrule, this was a time when the usual rules were not lived by. The Celts usually lived by strict rules, but during Samhain the rules were laid aside, and mischief was made, fortunes were told, and revels were had. Men dressed as women, women dressed as men, and bands of young people would wander for miles seeking food and drink from the farmsteads in return for the entertainment they offered. This is where one of the American traditions of Hallowe’en came from. Trick-or-treating was once called mumming, and was a time where groups of people, adults and children alike, would go from door to door in costume singing, jesting and posing as spirits. The people they visited would offer treats in exchange for the entertainment, and in order to create goodwill with the spirits.

Ancient people lived with a much closer relationship with death than many Americans do, and Samhain was a time of getting ready to face the possible losses that would be brought by winter. Herds of livestock were culled; the weak, sickly and old animals were slaughtered, so that there would be enough food for the healthy livestock to survive the winter. Samhain was considered the third, and last, harvest of the season. Called the Red Harvest, this harvest was of the meat. Some of the meat was salted and saved for winter, and some of the meat and all the bones were burned on the bone-fire (possibly the origin of the word bonfire) in offering to the spirits. The bone ash was used to nourish the fields where crops would be grown the next year.

Jack-o-lanterns were originally carved from turnips and other tubers, and were made as a warding to keep unfriendly spirits, mischievous faeries and hungry souls from stopping over. Bonfires were built on hilltops to light the way for the wandering dead, and to give them light and comfort in the darkness.

If any loved ones had died in the previous year, his or her family would put a lighted candle in the window to lead the spirit home. The living would leave doors and windows unlatched, and set a place at the supper table for their beloved dead. The family would eat in silence in honor of the dead, from whom death had taken voice.

The closeness of the different worlds during Samhain made it an especially easy time to catch a glimpse of the future, and many would play games of divination on Samhain eve. Apple bobbing descended from one of these games.

Los Dias de Muertos: Mexican Indian
This fiesta is a rich cultural and religious celebration originating in Mexico. Dia de los Muertos has roots in many indigenous Mexican Indian tribal traditions, including those of the Aztec, Mayan, Incan

and Toltec. After the invasion of the Spanish, Los Dias de Muertos came to include Catholic aspects as well, with much of the art and reverence including imagery of Jesus as one of the beloved dead.

Los Dias de Muertos is many days of celebrations, starting on October 31st with Dia de los Angelitos (Day of the Little Angels), dedicated to those who died young, Dia de Los Santos (Day of the Saints) on November 1st, and Dia de los Difuntos (All Souls Day) on November 2nd. There are parades, and a day and night is traditionally spent in the cemetery. The gravesites are cleaned and richly decorated with marigolds (the scent of which is believed to call the spirits of the dead home), bread and candy. Much attention is given to making the gravesites beautiful and spending time together remembering dear ones who have passed on. People bring musical instruments, blankets and baskets of food, and spend all night in vigil and celebration at the gravesides of their beloved dead.

Creation of huge family altars to the dead is central to the celebration of Los Dias de Muertos. These altars hold pictures of those who have passed, marigolds, brightly colored paper decorations (papél picados, papier maché skeletons attending to all the tasks and joys of life, smiling skulls and coffins made of a sugary confection called alfeñique, personal belongings of those who have died, water, salt, and an incense censer with copal resin burning. Sugar skulls, sweet Pan de Muertos (Bread of the Dead) and favorite foods of those being honored adorn the altars and are given out as treats. No expense of time, energy or money is spared in preparing the family altar.

A lighted candle on the altar represents each family member who has died in the previous year during the festivities, with one extra candle so no spirit is left out. The beloved dead are expected to visit during the festival and to partake of the ofrendas (offerings) piled high upon the altar.

In many small towns, doors are left open to encourage visitors, both alive and in spirit form, to enter homes, view the family altars, and partake of the sacred foods and drinks.

American Traditions:
Here in the United States, we are lucky to have the influence of the Celtic (by way of family lineage in some cases, and literature in others) and the Mexican (especially in California, Arizona, New Mexico and Texas) ways of celebrating this wonderful festival that honors death as just another transformation in the flow of life.

Here, we celebrate Halloween by dressing in costume, transforming ourselves into our dearest dreams or our scariest nightmares. We get to go out into the world as someone other than we usually are.

“Misrule” is still huge part of Halloween. People do things like yell “Happy Easter!” and reply with “Merry Christmas!” as they pass one another. On the less fun side of things, some see Halloween as an opportunity to perform dastardly deeds (like egging houses, smashing pumpkins, T.P.ing cars) that would be better left to the spirits!

Trick-or-treating is a gentler side of this tradition. Though trick-or-treating doesn’t always hold the beauty of a visit from the beloved dead, or the fun of a band of mummers, at least it’s not hurting anyone. At best, it is an opportunity to be out on the streets with friends and family, a part of a community, sharing an experience with others that doesn’t involve sitting back and watching the new Hollywood blockbuster.

Every year, holidays in America become more and more commercial. This year Halloween themed toys, gimmicks and costumery were out on the shelves by the beginning of the school year. But, you can decide to transform Halloween into a heartfelt and personal experience of the beauty of life and death.

What part of the celebrations you have read about stand out for you? The beautiful altars for the dead? Maybe you can find a local Mexican American cultural center and visit during Los Dias de Muertos? Maybe you liked the origins of trick-or-treating? This Halloween you could make a play with your friends, and perform it at each house you visit on Halloween. Or, perhaps the idea of giving generously at this time of year sounds good. With the help of a teacher in your school, you could set up a canned food drive for those in your community who do not have what they need to be warm and happy.

Activity: Making Alfeñique
These sugar calaveras (skulls) will be a fun, beautiful and spooky gift to give to your friends, or to place on your own altare de Muertos.

Ingredients:

2 cups powdered (confectioners) sugar
1 egg white
1/2 teaspoon vanilla
1/3 cup cornstarch
food coloring

Equipment:
2 mixing bowls
Egg beater
Measuring spoons
Clear, clean, dry surface for working the alfeñique
Wooden mixing spoon
Small plastic zip-lock baggie
Small bowls or saucers for food coloring
1 very fine paintbrush for each person who wants to paint alfeñique

How to:
1. Sift sugar into one mixing bowl.
2. Separate egg yolk from white. Throw away yolk.
3. Whip egg white until it is stiff enough to make peaks, in the other mixing bowl.
4. Still using the egg beater, mix vanilla into the egg whites.
5. Bit by bit, mix the sugar into the egg white mixture with the wooden mixing spoon.
6. Once the sugar and the egg mixture are so dry they start to crumble, work the mixture with your fingers until you can form it into a small ball.
7. Dust the dry surface with cornstarch.
8. On this surface, knead the mixture until the ball of alfenique is smooth.
9. Put the smooth ball into the plastic bag, and chill.
10. Once chilled, work the alfeñique into skull shapes, or whatever shapes you like.
11. Let alfeñique dry.
12. Once dry, paint with food coloring.

Recipe: Magickal Mulled Cider and Spirit Cakes

This Magickal Mulled Cider uses one of the most popular Halloween treats –apples- as a base for spices, which are full of magick! Listed below are some powers that these spices are believed to have, but it is also important to know that these powers change, sometimes from person to person.

The most important thing to remember when working magick of any kind, is that your intention (what you want to make happen) is the most important tool you have for any spell-working. So, as you work with this recipe, see what you think each spice does. Hold the spices in your hand, one at a time, and let your body tell you what each one is good for.

You can also give something a meaning. Though this may be considered a superstition by many, but what you believe has a lot of power. You can create meaning, a new reality even, just by believing.

Here are some traditional powers the spices you will use today are believed to have: Cloves are considered helpful to those in mourning, and they bring prophecy and offer protection. Nutmeg brings dreams, vision and wealth. Cinnamon is good for strengthening magickal acts, bringing success, wealth and health, bringing the second sight – the sight of prophecy – and it warms the spirit and the body. Allspice is for strengthening a community. Ginger warms, energizes and purifies. Lemon is for purification, and orange for love and vision.

This Magickal Cider will bring visions, comfort, warmth, health, wealth, love and a strong sense of community to all you share it with. It is great for a Halloween party, a Samhain night ritual, or anytime you feel the need for this warm magick. What a great way to enter into this new season. Don’t you think?

Magickal Mulled Cider
Ingredients:
1/2 gallon apple cider
3 cinnamon sticks for the pot,
Cinnamon sticks, one each per mug (optional)
1 Tablespoon whole cloves
1/4 teaspoon freshly grated nutmeg –or- 1/8 teaspoon dry, powdered nutmeg
5 pieces whole allspice
1 teaspoon fresh grated ginger –or- 1/4 teaspoon dry, powdered ginger
1 pinch ground cinnamon per mug
1 tablespoon dried orange peel –or- peel of one fresh orange
Pieces of fresh orange peel cut into stars and other shapes, one per mug (optional)
1 lemon, juiced and pulped

Equipment:
Large (6 Quart) saucepan
Small muslin spice bag –or- cheese cloth –or- a tea strainer
Spice grater
Small plate
Paring knife
Wooden mixing spoon
Ladle
Mugs all around

How-to:
1. Heat cider to a simmer in the sauce pan.
2. While cider heats, grate ginger and nutmeg onto plate.
3. If using fresh orange peel, cut peel into small pieces. (You can cut designs if you like. Stars, pumpkins, circles. Especially good for pieces to put into mugs.)
4. If you don’t like to have to strain the cider, put spices and peel into a spice bag, or tie in cheese cloth. (I prefer to leave the spices loose, and don’t mind straining. If you are the same, skip this step.)
5. Using wooden spoon, mix the cinnamon, ginger, allspice, cinnamon sticks, cloves, nutmeg, orange peel, lemon juice and pulp into the cider.
6. Allow to simmer for at least an hour and a half.
7. Serve hot. Ladle into mugs, and place a fresh cinnamon stick (optional) and fresh piece of orange peel in each mug.

If the cider is too spicy, or not spicy enough for your tastes, next time add more or less of whatever you want.

Serves: Many revelers

Soul Cakes
These cakes have lost of stories. The one thing you can be sure of is that they will fill the tummies of hungry visitors, spirit and living alike. This recipe includes rosemary for remembrance, and salt for cleansing.
All parts of this recipe are magick in some way. These are a few parts that have stories: Oat is useful for increasing the wealth of your home, and in lifting a bad mood. Wheat is for fertility, and is a wonderful way to recognize the relationship between life and death at this time of year. At this time, the seeds plowed under in the fields wait for the springtime warmth to sprout, and grow again.

6 oz. butter, softened
6 oz. fine, granulated sugar
3 egg yolks
1 lb. flour – unbleached wheat, whole wheat, oat, or a mixture.
A pinch of salt
1 teaspoon of ground allspice –or- mixed spices -which do you think would taste good? What kind of magick do you want in these cakes?
1 teaspoon of fresh rosemary, chopped finely.
3 oz. currants
A little warm milk

How-to:
1. Set the oven to 350ºF.
2. Cream the butter and sugar together in a bowl until fluffy.
3. Beat in the egg yolks.
4. Sift together the flour, salt and spice.
5. Add currants.
6. Fold the currants and the flour, salt and spice into the egg mixture.
7. Add milk bit by bit, to form a soft dough.
8. Divide into pieces and form into flat cakes.
9. Place on a greased baking sheet.
10. Cut designs into the top of cakes.
11. Bake for 20 minutes or until golden.

Sweetly Creative D.I.Y. Valentine’s Day Gifts

Give your loved ones gifts that will make them smile the whole year round! These easy to make, creative, do it yourself Valentine’s Day gifts can be given to your lover, your child, your mother, or anyone you’re grateful for.

For even more smiles, you can make one or more of theses gifts with a loved one for another loved one – spend an afternoon making a gratitude board for your spouse with your kids, or a Thanks Bank for your kid with your spouse!

Turning these projects into a shared experience makes the day – and the gifts – many times more sweet.

1. Thanks Bank
A Thanks Bank will remind your loved one that you’re thankful for them anytime they desire. You just fill the bank with thanks, and they can make a withdrawal anytime they want or need a reminder of how much you love them.

The basic design of this gift is super easy, though you can make it as ornate as you like.

Supplies:
* A decorative jar, a jewelry box, a decorated little cardboard box, a mason jar stickers on it, or whatever you’d like to use as the bank.
* Paper.
* A writing implement.

Optional:
* Decoupage and images.
* Beddazlements.
* Pictures of you and your loved one

How To:
1. Create the container as you like. Sparkles, decoupage, pictures, ribbon, writing, or plain, elegantly sparse. Make it a gift your loved one will love showing off!
2. Take the paper and writing implement, and write as many thank you notes as you want. It can be anything from “I’m grateful for you!” to “I’m grateful when you…” For your kid that might be “…give me hugs.” For your lover, you might get super duper creative. The more full you make the container, the more impressive the present, so really go for it. You want a container that’s practically overflowing with thank you notes.
3. Write a love note, a poem, a THANK YOU, or all of the above – and directions; “This Thanks Bank will be here for you when you want a reminder of how thankful I am for all the things you bring to my life,” or however you might want to say it.
4. Fill the container with the notes, and voila, you’re done!

2. Gratitude Board
A Gratitude Board can be hung on a wall, placed on a nightstand, or put on a personal or family Gratitude Altar.
Supplies:
* Board – wooden, card stock, cardboard, plastic, whatever you like.
* Paste or decoupage.
* Tissue or construction paper.
* Images; pictures, postcards, photos, Valentine’s hearts, etc.

How To:
1. Paste the board with paper as desired. This will serve as a background.
2. Paste images on in an aesthetically pleasing way.

3. Gratitude Journal

With this item you can give the gift of gratitude twice! Create a Gratitude Journal for your loved one where he or she can record his or her gratitude practice. To inspire creative flow you can pepper your reminders that you’re grateful for your loved one, and the reasons why you are, throughout the book.

Supplies:
* Journal with blank or lined pages, depending on your loved one’s preference.
* Writing implement.

Optional:
* Decoupage and images.
* Beddazlements.
* Pictures of you and your loved one.

How To:
1. Write your gratitude for your loved one on random pages.
2. Decorate the journal as you like.

These simple, sweet, creative projects put YOU into the giving, and the gift! Of course, you can take these simple gifts and combine them with an orchestrated Valentine’s Day plan or any of the more traditional gifts, but keeping it simple, sweet, and  fun may be just what’s desired.

Enjoy a memorable Valentine’s Day, and the sweet year that follows.

Finding Light in the Darkness – The Reason for the Season

The celebration of this season has roots in the timeless, hidden promise of light and warmth that lives within the dark. Even after the longest night of the year is over, winter still holds sway. But the light does begin its ascent to grandeur and glory in the eternal procession of seasons.

With eyes open to this bit of earth-based awareness, you’ll see representations of this ode to light reflected in whatever rituals are performed – be it the hanging of twinkling Christmas lights, the lighting of the Menorah, or the Mshumaa, or the burning of the Yule log.

Each one of these ceremonies bring us to the same moment of invocation of the return of the light, and gratitude for the flickering promise that lives in the kindling of the first spark.

Let this be a chance to invoke the light within as well. Whether you celebrate Solstice, Hanukkah, or Christmas, whether you are calling in the light of the Sun, the miracle of lights, or the light of Christ, conjure it inside of you.

Make time this season to commit to a new light within you! Light a candle and say a prayer. Light a host of candles with loved ones, and voice your dreams for the newly burgeoning light. Let each string of lights be a reminder to awaken to the potential of the coming year. Let each fire glowing in the hearth and heart be a reminder of the power of a return to warmth and light.

The Answer to the Season’s Biggest Question; Yes, Santa IS Real!

Keywords: — The Answer to the Season’s Biggest Question; Yes, Santa IS Real!, santa claus, santa clause, god, christmas, family, values, generosity, mysticism, children, santa is real, holiday season, hard questions, faith, christmas spirit, jesus, belief , magic, miracles, christmas miracles, question, santa, spirit, babbo natale

When it comes to the delicate matter of belief, there are creative ways to answer our children’s questions without taking the magic out of life.

When my oldest daughter was about five, she asked whether Santa Claus was real. Her dad and I told her that Santa is real to those who believe.

Is love real? Is hope real? Is magic real? Is faith real? We can’t touch or see any of these things, but most of us do believe in at least a few of them. In some cases, we can feel them. In others, we see proof of them appearing in the physical world.

I still believe in Santa Claus, and always will.

I believe that Tibetan Lamas reincarnate with full recall of their previous lives. I believe in knights in shining armor, and princesses in towers. Sometimes it irks me to admit it, but believe I do. I believe in faeries, and faerie tales, pookas, ghosts, saints, and goblins. And I believe in Christmas miracles.

Just like I believe in God, with Its ineffability, and the many faces It wears.

<em>Jitterbug Perfume</em> by Tim Robbins has one of the best descriptions I’ve seen of the human relationship with deity. The premise is this: the gods depend upon our belief in them to survive. Our belief makes them real.

The power of belief is an important gift we must safeguard and instruct in our children. Belief is what we build our lives upon. Without belief, we’re cast adrift on an endless, meaningless sea. Belief offers a rudder when nothing else can help us find our way. 

At 12, my oldest daughter started our Christmas festivities by saying she no longer believes in Santa. And then complained when she didn’t feel the Christmas Spirit flooding her as we trimmed the tree.

I talked to her about faith.

The fact is, sometimes it’s been hard to have faith that Santa will come. I’ll admit it; even I of abundant belief I have been known to test The Spirit from time to time. In 2006 I made one such test. It was my first Christmas post-divorce. I had no one to give my Christmas list to. No one to tell what I hoped to find under the tree. That year it was hard to find my belief in the Spirit of Christmas.

I wanted indoor/outdoor, “Ugg” knock-off slippers. It was what I wanted. It was a deal between me and God, and since I had asked, God knew exactly what was required to prove my faith. I know, it’s kind of petty. Slippers?

But sometime it’s the little things that matter. Cozy feet on a lonely morning. A small gift out of nowhere.

Come Christmas, I was gifted a pair of slippers. The gifter didn’t buy them for me, but for a niece. When the slippers didn’t fit the quickly growing girl, my sister asked me to take them instead; she didn’t want to go to the trouble of carrying them home on the plane and exchanging them.

I whispered a thank you to Santa, and reminded myself that sometimes He works in mysterious ways. He makes miracles occur. Or at least the belief in Him does.

I didn’t know my sister was bringing slippers for the nieces. She didn’t know I wanted them, either. But He did. And He delivered.

Throughout my life I’ve seen innumerable miracles of Christmas faith occur, large and small. Movies are built on the theme of The Christmas Miracle.

Art imitates life. Off the screen, food banks fill for at least one day with more than enough to feed the local hungry. I’ve seen people open their doors to strangers so they would have somewhere to be on Christmas morning. I’ve seen communities pull together and provide gifts for children who would have otherwise gone without.

To quote the words of song writer Red West, popularized by Elvis, “if every day could be just like Christmas, what a wonderful world this would be.”

Christmas movies with their grand, soaring themes serve only as a reminder of what’s possible when we allow ourselves to invest in love and faith. And as believing becomes more effortless, the miracles become larger.

My faith in the Miracle of Christmas is no longer shakable. No more tests required – I finally got my ultimate proof.

In 2007 my Christmas Miracle was the grandest The Spirit of Christmas has yet conspired to deliver for me. The man I’ve been waiting my whole life to find crossed mountains and rivers that stormy December to be by my side and spend the holidays with me and the children.

The holidays have never ended for us. They’ll continue for the rest of our lives. The man of my dreams, now my husband, hasn’t left since.

That Christmas I felt like both Doris and little Susan in Miracle on 34th Street; the home, the family, the life that I had been nearly afraid to desire became my greatest Christmas miracle. Now every holiday season is a celebration of that most profound of miracles; the emergence of a love perfect and complete.

As a Mystic Mama, I don’t feel that I’m misleading my children by encouraging them to believe in a power that makes their lives happier, more joyous, more bountiful, more hopeful, more magical.

As they grow older, my children get to become an active part of that energy of selfless giving. They become the ones who enact the spirit. The arms, legs, bodies and hearts that offer those miracles up.

I know from personal experience that the Holiday Spirit does exist. It’s palpable. It acts in the world.

Call it the power of faith, or Jesus, or Santa Claus, or generosity, it’s a reminder of a bond of love for our fellow man. Regardless of the name we give it, it sustains. It acts through and for each of us, bringing miracles to bear.

Kind of like God.

THE FIRST R: REDUCE

Reduce, Reuse, Recycle -it’s actually a pyramid, not a circle!

The slogan “Reduce, Reuse, Recycle” is in that order for a reason; it makes more sense to envision it as a pyramid than the circular form it’s usually represented as.

Reduce is the foundation of that pyramid. Reevaluating and reducing consumer habits is the best thing we can do to decrease our planetary impact.

It’s also a softer on the checkbook.

Reducing can be an easy step, and many easy choices, that add up to a big change. Some of those steps will happen naturally, as a response to the tightening of belts that occurs in times of financial uncertainty.

Reduce Use of Gasoline:

When gas prices shot sky-high in the summer of ’08, my family reduced our number of shopping trips per week. We live rurally, so we planned better, and made each 30+ mile drive to and from the nearest place of commerce really count.

Yeah, it’s tiring to go to five stores in one day. But we saved a lot of money (and time), and reduced our use of gasoline by about 3/4.

Even though gas prices have dropped for the time-being, we’ve more-or-less stuck with the newly-learned habit of 1 – 2 shopping trips a week. And it feels great to know that we’re simultaneously saving money AND decreasing our use of petroleum products.

Buy in Bulk:

Buying in bulk reduces post-consumer waste, and often helps you save some pennies in the process. In some areas, there are buyers cooperatives that you can join, and go in on true bulk ordering. This saves money, travel or the delivery to individual stores for you and the delivery company, and packaging waste.

Consider the Concept of “Affluenza“:

Perhaps the most comprehensive way you and your family can foster the reduce piece of the puzzle is to reconsider the desire to keep up with the Joneses. Don’t get the next gadget that comes along, even though your kid might beg, kick, and scream for the newest of the new of the e-game-component du-jour.

Ideally, as you begin changing your habits and educating your kids about the reasons why, they’ll be less inclined to see disposable culture as they once did. Based on your modeling, and the new information they’ll receive through family conversation, they’re likely to be less prone to emotional response to acquisitive desires.

But in the case that attachment does arise, here are some things to remember, and to remind about; not only does the new thing create future trash, but the old one instantly becomes waste in the process.

And, your wallet gets that-much lighter every time you give in to the consuming-for-consuming’s-sake urge. It’s up to you how much of that part you want to share with your child. There’s a fine line between honesty and over-sharing. You can figure out where yours is.

Finally, remember this; just the process of asking the question, “Do we NEED this?” will in many cases lead to a substantial decrease in purchases.

One caution; too much of a limitation of recreational buying can cause a sense of poverty or undue pressure in itself. Allow yourself and your kids the occasional impulse of luxury buy. I myself go for magazines, or an inexpensive bit of make-up. (This is common. There’s actually a name for this recession related pattern; The Lipstick Index.)

I have a rule that works with my younger daughter, too. With any shopping trip that she needs to go on, she gets to choose an inexpensive treat at the end, like a special food treat or a little toy. There is one condition to this treat; that she not ask for anything during the shopping trip.

Yes, this could be seen as bribery. But it’s also a little tradition we’ve created together, and it makes both of us happy, makes her feel comfortable in her own ability to have a voice and a choice, and I don’t end up having to say “NO!” throughout the whole shopping trip. And that alone is worth it.

When the shopping trip consists of multiple stops, my daughter’s purchase is saved for the last.

About the author: Author Bio:
Lasára Allen is an author, educator, advocate, and the creator of Gratitude Games. Her writing covers a range of topics including gratitude, parenting, relationships, bipolar disorder, fitness, yoga, health & holistic well-being, compassion, and spiritual practice. As an educator and advocate, Lasára speaks about living, parenting & working with bipolar disorder, gratitude as a spiritual practice & an opportunity for community & global involvement, grateful parenting & raising grateful children.

Over the years, Lasára has helped clients and students find balance in their lives, and alignment with personal and family-held values. She has taught, spoken, and coached internationally. She began designing Gratigories and other Gratitude Games in 2008. Lasára is a mom to two daughters, and wife to the love of her life. Find out more more at http://www.LasaraAllen.com, and http://www.TheGratitudePlace.com.
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